Before discussing about whether long distance relationship works or not lets answer a question as to “Why long distance?”

1)Maybe you think you won’t find anyone better considering your past experience.😬

2)You may like her/him because you don’t know them enough.🤔

3)Maybe the relationship was not such but after 2-3 yrs you started living apart for job.😓

I’ll answer all of the 3 questions above but first we need to understand few concepts

Guys, the first thing we need to understand over here is that DISTANCE creates additional attraction and curiosity in our mind as compared to normal situation.

For example: If a gal is on a vacation in your city and you met her either in an event, marriage, class, training etc., if you are attracted to her on a scale of 1 to 10 (Say 6🙂). The fact that she is here just for few days would instantly size up your attraction to 7 or 8😍.

Theory of cognitive dissonance:

Cognizance=Knowledge about something

Dissonance=Disagreement among your beliefs

It’s believed that distance makes you believe what you don’t usually do in normal circumstances

For example: If you hate smokers and don’t want a smoker chick as your gf(Cognizance) , because she is here just for few weeks would make you justify your feelings towards her(Dissonance) and your actions to try to lock her down into commitments.

(Bad way to go pal🙄)

Emotional Singularity:

In physics, singularity is the centre of a black hole where the laws of physics ceases to operate and time stops. Similarily there is something called emotional singularity where the time stops

For example: If a couple is in a live-in relationship. They would start understanding each other soo much better and see for themselves whether do they really like each other or was it just attraction. Dealing with each others’ bad habbits, no pretentions, no sugar coating personalities or putting your best foot forward.They may end up loving each other more than ever or end up pulling each others hairs. 😝

The long distance halts this natural process. A “5 yrs old relationship” may seem very long but effectively would be of 1-2 yrs of communication and rest of the yrs may have gone to that emotional black hole.😱

In short, the event where they pull each others’ hairs got delayed until after marriage. 😶Why do you think most people instantly lose attraction after marriage.

It’s very important to keep communicating your wants and needs to your partner and try to be in a live-in relationship to speeden up the process and ultimately save your time, if things were not meant to work out. That’s the harsh truth we gotta accept. 😓

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ANSWERS TO ABOVE QUESTIONS:

1st: You never found a girl/guy like her/him before so be glad you finally have a proof that they exist out there so keep looking for better situations and options😉.

Always remember, History repeats itself. There is nothing called “The one”. We fall in love multiple times with same intensity.

2nd: Love and relationships are not based on some magic. They are built on understanding. The better you understand a person and take your time to be exclusive, the more stronger the bond is gonna develop.

(Attraction can be magical and feel like “The La La land” 😍 and sometimes its very tempting to just go with the flow😜 but in the end you gotta have some standards and stand up for yourself and understand the practicality-Do you really wanna be away from someone and meet just twice in 6 months?

3rd: Just try and see whether are you able to handle it or is it messing up your brains. Are you ultimately gonna move in with each other or not. Are you a type of person who doesn’t really care about all that nonsense and focus on your career. Who are you and what do you really want.

“Don’t let Emotional Singularity befool you”😉

Please comment and let me know what do you wanna ask and want me to talk about.